Apparently, the non-Parkinson’s part of my brain didn’t get the notice that the Parkinson’s part of my brain isn’t exactly reliable these days. Ideas still pop up before I can stop them—like a reflex, or maybe like a dog spotting a squirrel.

The problem is, once I throw out an idea, people assume I’m signing up to make it happen. And before I know it, I’m knee-deep in a project when I should have just lobbed the idea back like a volleyball and stepped out of the game.

The truth is, my producing and event coordinating days are in the past. PD doesn’t exactly mix well with high-pressure logistics. I’m easily overwhelmed, anxious, and one poorly timed stress bomb could make my medication as useful as a flashlight with dead batteries in a blackout. The work requires relentless physical energy and razor-sharp cognitive function—two things no longer in my skill set. My skills are like books on a high shelf—I know they’re there, but I just can’t reach them.

However! If you need ideas or advice? I’m here to help. Need a contact? I might have one. Emails and social media posts? Sure, in small, digestible doses. But if you need someone to run the show? That’s a hard no.

These days, I’m more like Captain Picard in the command chair—happy to offer wisdom and guidance, but I’m not the one beaming down for the away mission.